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Hello and welcome to our website. Feel free to have a look round, you might find something you're interested in. If not, thanks for dropping in anyway. Have a nice day! If you have any comments or questions please drop us a line: webmaster@akers-online.co.uk Curiosity Corner Quote "People who stay in glass hotels shouldn't throw parties." - Batman Trivia Did you know that it took a total of sixteen Mini Coopers to make the original "The Italian Job"? Some of them were beefed up with BMC 1800cc B-series engines so they could climb the stairs! Joke A man was walking along a California beach deep in prayer. All of a sudden he said out loud, "Lord grant me one wish." Immediately the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want." The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honor and glorify me." The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing', and how I can make a woman truly happy." The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?" Irony Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey will make an attempt with the same result, all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will actually try to prevent it. Now put away the cold water, remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and another attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted. Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him now have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey. After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana. Why not? Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been done around here. And that is how a company policy begins. Thought Provoker Aren't NASA a bunch
of genii? When they first started sending up astronauts, they quickly
discovered that ball-point pens wouldn't work in zero gravity. To combat
this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing
a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost
any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing
to over 300 C. The Russians used a pencil. Satire Frodo has failed ... look who has the ring of power ...
And Finally... To find out how the world-wide story ends, click here. |
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